Rethinking your next life stage
Light bulb moments
When visiting my son in Oxford in 2017, I bought a book entitled “The 100 Year Life – Living and Working in an Age of Longevity” by Lynda Gratton and Andrew J Scott. I hadn’t heard of the book before but a scan of its cover was enough to whet my appetite. The authors outline the challenges and intelligent choices that all of us, of any age, need to make in order to turn greater life expectancy into a gift and not a curse.
Now you might wonder why I was drawn to that book. I was at that life stage (my mid-fifties) where I was beginning to wonder about where my life was going and if education, career, family and retirement was all there was for us? At this stage I was also actively looking forward 5 – 10 years and considering what I would do in my so called ‘retirement’ (or as Ivan Yates calls it "Rewiring not Retiring"). This book opened my eyes to the concept of a multi-stage life and focussed my thinking about how I could develop in my next life stage.
Gratton and Scott draw on a 2009 study to show that if the trend continues, more than half the babies born in wealthier countries since 2000 may reach their 100th birthdays. Those who live to 100 have around 100,000 extra productive hours than those who live to 70. Undoubtedly, work will take a significant portion of these hours. Leaving to one side the cost of sustaining such long lives (that would take another volume of articles!), the authors contend that we need to create a world where this is feasible and beneficial, a way that makes a longer life a blessing and not a curse.
More than half the babies born in wealthier countries since 2000 may reach their 100th birthdays.
The life structure that emerged in the 20th century – a three-stage life of education, work and then retirement – is unlikely to survive this elongation.
This is where the ‘multi-stage’ life comes in – with repeated changes of direction and attention, where activity and age become disconnected. In one stage, the focus may be on accumulating financial assets, in another, creating a better work-life balance. Material and intangible assets will need upkeep, renewal or replacement. Skills will need updating, augmenting or discarding, as will networks of friends and acquaintances. Earning will be interspersed with learning or self-reflection.
As someone who loves being busy and has accumulated a wealth of knowledge and experience in my life so far, the ‘old style’ three-stage life wasn’t sitting comfortably with me.
My lightbulb moments from reading this book were instrumental in rethinking my next life stage:
I need to seize the opportunities and space that a longer, active life offers me
Longevity is not about getting older it’s about being younger for longer
I need to rethink how I can use my experience and knowledge to support others
Refreshed thinking
Another light bulb moment came my way in September 2019. Attending a Wellbeing Workshop organised by my previous employer (thanks @Giles Barrett) I met the amazing Liam Moggan. Liam is a coaching specialist and known as “Coach to the Coaches” in sporting circles. He was facilitating this workshop with colleagues from the University of Limerick. He’s a great man for the acronyms and I came away from this day with an acronym that was to be my guiding light for my next life stage – REFRESH.
This became my mantra for rebooting myself when I started my new decade in January this year after leaving my previous life and work of over 40 years. This rebooting ethos enabled me to rebuild my energy when I stopped working and look forward with an open mind.
In my role as a Senior Leader in AIB to teams of between 15 and 20 people, I found that the area I got most energy from was supporting my teams to unlock and fulfil their potential.
This experience motivated me to explore this area and develop my coaching skills further. Over the past few months I have completed an Advanced Diploma in Personal, Life and Executive Coaching. Through this course I have explored my values, beliefs and purpose and am now in the process of establishing my coaching practice.
My motivation now is to enable others to become the best version of themselves.
Rethinking your next Life Stage – key takeaways
No matter what stage of life you are at follow these key takeaways to help you get clarity on where next for you:
1. Say it out loud
We have all thoughts and ideas running around in our head but sometimes it is only when we say them out loud that we commit ourselves to them. For me the first stage of really thinking seriously about my next life stage was when I said to my boss: “You know I won’t be here in 5 years”. Sometimes we have to bring our private thoughts public in order to hold ourselves to them.
2. Invest in yourself
Use your free time to invest in yourself. Whether that’s your health and fitness, skills or relationships. Learn to understand who you are and what makes you tick. Follow your passions. Think of the experiences you want to have and plan for them. Speak to others who are having those experiences to see what you can learn from them.
3. Explore and experiment
Explore your options. Begin making small changes and put your toe in the water. Be flexible and open to change. We won’t always get it right first time but the important thing is to make a start and grow from there.
I've now said it out loud again and am actively investing in myself and really enjoying exploring and experimenting. Hopefully you will get some little nuggets to enable you rethink your next life stage.
At a crossroads? Wondering what's next for you in your life?
